Troubles that Never Cease
by Ketsueki-Ken
Summary: A trip to China goes really REALLY bad for one ancient ex-pharoah. He would have been able to overcome it but than Bakura had to be himself and now it's his problem too and Mariks. With an easy fix available will they get through it all despite the hormones and rampant jealousy? Probably. But it'll be funny in any case. Yamishipping with some SetoxYami
1. Chapter 1

A trip to China goes really REALLY bad for one ancient ex-pharoah. He would have been able to overcome it but than Bakura had to be himself and now it's his problem too and Mariks. With an easy fix available will they get through it all despite the hormones and rampant jealousy? Probably. But it'll be funny in any case.

~o~

Troubles That Never Cease

~o~

Chapter 1

~o~

He didn't breath. Though he supposes that didn't really mean much as he didn't necessarily _need_ to breath to begin with; even in the current form he was in. The very act of breathing, something that every living being (for the most part) did without a conscious effort- well, for him, it was just habit. That and people would give him weird looks when he didn't. For some reason it was something people didn't miss. He had to actually think about breathing. He was like a dolphin in that respect. Though if he decided not to, he wouldn't die of asphyxiation. See, he was one of three _special_ beings that basically defied the- know what? He was getting off topic.

Right, so he didn't breath.

In fact, he didn't even blink. He moved not a single muscle. He was statuesque in his unmoving. To move a muscle would break that single thread keeping him together. To any onlooker it would have been down right freaky. Yes, even his inner circle would find his current state unnerving. And it wouldn't just be because he was staring at his reflection in the bathroom mirror- looking like someone had frozen time in his little section of floor space.

His eye twitched.

"_KY__AAAAAAHHH_! ! !" He screamed for all he was worth. Head thrown back, arched until he was practically staring at the ceiling, arms curled, hands clenched into fists- this was going to be biblical. All he needed to complete this image of horrific rage was storm clouds and lightening. But the forecast for clear blue sunny skies were having none of it. That had been yesterday. He'd just have to settle for the early morning dawn.

When the scream ended the tri-haired teen stared at his reflection with such utter shock and horror that it had morphed his face into a look that had never before made an appearance. As if some deranged and psychotic killer- whom had killed and plundered in the most depraved of ways- had proposed they pillage the land together and live happily ever after. It took a lot to get this particular look on his face. Hell, he hung around Bakura and Marik- _Marik_- for _christ's_ sake! _They_ never managed to bring such a look to his face and they _proposed_ the same damn thing! He even enjoyed it dammit!

This was saying something.

"Yami! What's with the screaming? Is something wrong? Open the door." His shorter counterpart's concerned but muffled voice called from the other side of the door. He dropped the stance he'd been stuck in since the scream. Yes even through his perusal of his current state, he had moved nothing but his eyes.

"Uh- nothing!" He called back in as deep a voice he could manage. Frantically- some would have even said desperately- he searched the small lavatory. Looking for something other than the pathetic towel to cover himself. Not that he was naked.

"I don't believe you. You sounded about ready to kill someone and it's only five in the morning." Yugi reasoned. The concern still audible in his tone as he wriggled the door knob.

"I don't know what you're talking about Aibou, I didn't scream." he spoke as confidently as he could with the towel muffling his voice. Thank god it was clean.

"Why do you- you know what? Fine. I didn't hear anything. Everything is fine. Now open the damn door and let me in." Uh oh. Yugi was getting his assertive voice on. Dropping the towel he unlocked the door.

"Fine." He relented disappearing just as Yugi yanked the door open at the admission. The shorter teen barely even got a glimpse of his darker half.

(_Why did you go back in your soulroom?_) He asked, trying not to sound demanding. He set his clothes on the counter top as he readied himself for a shower.

((_ I was-uh… naked._)) Yami replied before closing the mind link. Yugi wanted to pester. He really did. Especially after that scream. It had even woke grandpa- and he was a heavy sleeper. But he decided to let it go for the time being. He'd ask later.

Not like Yami could hide in the puzzle forever. He'd get bored.

~o~

Domino, Japan

~o~

In the back alleys of this fair city, you could always expect something to be going on. Be it gang-related, homeless-related, or even just animal-related. For this particular section, of this particular day, it was just not happening. No sound except the rustling of loose paper fluttering around with the breezy day they were having. In fact, if you listened- you'd hear the wind making that 'wooing' sound.

_'wooo...'_

See?

Two blurs rounded the corner destroying whatever semblance of peace this particular alley had been having that morning. A rumbling engine and screeching tires sounded a little ways down from whence they came. Indicating that yes, this pair of hoodlums were indeed in as much trouble as the speed they were running warranted.

Though you couldn't really tell with the way they spoke to each other.

"Why did the Pharaoh have to go with the shrimp to China?" A raspy irritated voice asked- more like he whined but the blonde didn't want to say anything (too many arguments came from the accusation as it were)- as he ran along side his partner in crime (who was the blonde). Both were currently running from loud blaring sirens that were apart of a particular vehicle that lighted up red and blue.

"I think it had something to do with the fact he was hanging around us too much." The blonde replied with the same, if not _darker,_ tone of voice. As much as he wanted to, reminding Bakura that Atem would be back later that day wouldn't in fact make him easier to deal with. He knew from experience. This is why he didn't give his fellow spirit the opening he wanted to breach the subject. He tried not to smirk when he saw the shadow of a pout on his companion.

"Well, we have been-watch out for the KITTEN!" The Tomb-Robber screeched out, cutting of whatever admission he'd been about to make. The warning came too late. Half a second later, the Tomb-Keeper was sent flying head over feet over the fluffy stray and tumbling unto the dirty cement in an undignified heap next to a dumpster. His foot had fallen into a pothole.

"Marik! Now is not the time to sit on that fine ass of yours!" Bakura hollered as he ran passed the disgruntled spirit. Oh, as soon as the opportunity hit the blonde was going to get back at him. If it hadn't been for that crazy shout he wouldn't have wiped out in the first place. The damn git knew it too. Shaking his head cutely, he spotted the car that had been chasing them for the passed hour. Getting up he caught up to the other spirit in a flash. Literally.

"Why the hell doesn't he call for back up!" He wondered aloud as they turned right. With the state of the car, any sane man would have given up long ago. Now that he thought about it, the cop should have called for back up as soon as they started running- Hell seeing as it had them would had pulled the heist he should have called it in on principle.

Dragging in breath he didn't necessarily need to breath in Bakura shrugged, not bothering to see if Marik caught the motion or not. Inwardly, the blonde was thinking about the seemingly unending maze they'd run into. Not really annoyed to see that the alley's they've been running down were big enough for the car to go through (seeing as that was half the fun)- but more then a little impressed at the amount of alley Domino had at it's disposal. You'd have never thought it walking street side.

"It probably has something to do with the reward out for those who can catch us in the act!" Bakura answered after a moment of them just running. It was almost therapeutic- the running that is. Maybe there _was _something to the whole being chased-by-whomever, and Ryou hadn't just been talking out of his ass trying to get him to stop his wicked ways. He put that thought on a back burner as he jumped over a resting hobo, he'd mention it later and see what Marik thought about it. "Hey! You should get out of the way Mister!"

Ignoring the fact that the thief just saved some homeless guy from getting killed Marik grabbed for something to say in the suddenly awkward silence. Well if you could ignore blaring cop sirens- it was pretty darn silent. He heard from Malik that Ryou had put some rule down that had Bakura being nice to three different strangers each day. Seeing as it was only six, Bakura must be starting early. The silence going on longer then was comfortable he spewed the next thing to come to him. Which happened to be about the cops.

"You couldn't tell there was still a reward for our capture with this one car, eh?" He chuckled giving a side glance before the chuckle suddenly died with his mirth at their situation. He'd just given Bakura the damn opening he was waiting for. If you could slump whilst running for ones life- Marik did it. It was too early for one of Bakura's tantrums.

"That's because the stupid blasted Pharaoh isn't here!"

"They noticed?" Marik muttered sarcastically. He actually wouldn't put it passed them. In their gang of three, Atem had managed to become their mastermind. The authorities had definitely noticed. Turning another corner he felt his heart lurch.

"_Dead end!_"

~o~

Plane

~o~

(_Okay, what's the problem?_) Yugi thought as he finally managed to force the mindlink open. (You haven't spoken since the bathroom incident.) he added. Yami said nothing but he could definitely sense discomfort and even embarrassment. (_Yami?_)

((_Ugh- okay. I'll-uh... I'll tell you._)) Ten minutes had gone by before his friend had cracked. Right on the dot. Yugi grinned.

(_Take your time._) He replied as he typed out his message to Jounouchi.

((_Um, about that… okay, the best way to go on with this… is to show you._)) Yami replied after only a moment.

The hikari waited patiently. He remembered the scream from this morning and suddenly stopped typing. Yami had been just fine last night. To bring on that sound this _something_ had to be big. Sighing, he stared at his nails. He was after all a nail biter and he wanted to see if he would be needing any for this… development. He had a feeling he did. He'd never been proven more right.

((_Brace yourself._)) his yami muttered.

Yugi stared mouth slack jaw at the sight before him.

((_Aibou, this would be a nice time to say something._)) The spirit stated nervously as he shut the boys mouth.

(_Um, well… this is new. What happened?_) Yugi would fully admit he failed terribly in hiding his shock. He was even getting stares from the person across from him. He might have made a small sound.

((_Remember that restaurant we went to- when your grandpa was going shopping?_)) Yami disappeared into the puzzle, seeing that his current state was distracting the younger,

(_Ya, that old lady was really nice._) Yugi replied after a moment to regain his senses. He returned to his laptop. Trying for a semblance of normal. Yami sounded a bit skittish.

((_Well-when-I-was-going-to-the-washroom-she-cornered-me-and-blew-this-stuff-in-my-face._))

(_What, does this have to do with how you are now?_) The hikari asked as he sent his e-mail to Jou. Getting a feeling of distress he emitted a sense of comfort. (_Don't worry. I didn't mention anything about you._)

Yugi could practically hear his pout.

((_Well, after that, she said something about it helping me in my love life. I didn't really listened to her much after that. The stuff made me smell like flowers and it sparkled and it made me itchy- I sent her to the shadow realm_.))

(_YAMI!_)

((S_he freaked me out!_)) The pharaoh defended. ((_Trust me. If I knew this was going to happen I would have wrung her little neck and demand-_))

(_Yami._)

((_But I didn't because I didn't know._))

(S_till…_) Yugi sighed (_Can you get her back? I mean, how are we going to hide this? Your not exactly fighting with the other yami's._)

((_Finding her may be a small problem. But I could do it. If the Shadow Realm hasn't rendered her moo-MY GOD! What am I going to do! It's going to be horrible. They'll never let this die._)) For a moment, Yugi thought that Bakura and Marik finding out wouldn't have been a problem. If he'd been a betting man, he would have lost.

(_I think I have an idea, but we're going to have to call in outside help._) He offered as the thoughts he was getting from Yami became discernible.

((_There is no way in HELL your getting Anzu!_))

Yugi smiled, already typing up a message.

(_Don't worry… I have some one else in mind_)

~o~

**A/N**

This story has always made me laugh. It's just on the right side of crack, yeah? I found that it needed a little sprucing up. So that's what I'm going to do. Here's the first revised chapter. The next one shall be put up sometime tomorrow... er- later today.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and will continue reading on even though the following chapters are unedited.

:)

Review it. Favorite it. Alert it. C2 it. Do what you will, as long as you do something.

Ken.


	2. Chapter 2

~o~

Chapter 2

~o~

Atem sat in his soul room. Right there on the freaking floor. What he really wanted to do was sprawl upon it- BUT, he still had his dignity. Even though he was pretty sure that would fly out the window as soon as somebody other than Yugi and his Grandpa found out. If either of the other yami's saw him, his dignity would die a gruesome knife wielded death. Of that he was sure. After The-Bar-Hopping-Night-of-Epic-Hell (yes, capitals were needed to encompass the significance of _that_ night), both dignity and pride had taken a beating. If not for Bakura getting up on the stripper pole and Marik propositioning a homeless man (the same homeless man that Bakura would later save from getting hit by a car actually), he would have had nothing to fire back at them. As it were, no one could get anything out of the trio. The one time Bakura had been about to use it against him, the thief had disappeared for a week, and came back looking like shit.

That was in the past- ruby red eyes narrowed- and it was going to stay that way.

Sighing, his face took on a pout. As if life was complicated enough. Being wanted by the police. Being wanted by Kaiba (if the little gifts he'd get every now and then were to be believed). _This_. Running his hand through his hair, he summoned a mirror. Was his hair always this long?

Getting up, his room lightened, revealing that the space held more than a brooding spirit. Tastefully decorated, spacious, now containing a wooden framed mirror that didn't really need to be floor to ceiling but it was; free standing and practically a wall. Atem took in his reflection like he couldn't earlier that morning in the bathroom. Immediately his eyes feel on the new appendages on his chest. Male brain finally kicked in- he slowly brought both hands up and copped a feel.

"They're not small, that's for sure." he thought out loud. Returning his eyes to the mirror he took in his changes. The most obvious. He was a woman now... girl? How would you classify yourself when you looked like a teen but lived for a millennia?

His hair hadn't grown any, just fell limply against his shoulders, in rather artful layers that framed his face; shorter in the back longer in the front- enhanced by the blonde fringe and magenta streaks. His face as sharp as ever, no softening of the eyes, though his eye lashes seemed a touch more noticeable. His lips hadn't much changed except for the pink tinge they now contained. So his face was pretty much the same. Aside from his... breasts, the only thing you'd probably note, was his lack of musculature. Oh he could still feel his physical strength, you just couldn't see it. He was still lean with only a slight swell around his hips. And if it was possible, he had gotten shorter by an inch. Thankfully, he was still taller then Yugi. All in all, he was still recognizable and only an idiot would think differently.

"Not bad." he muttered. Twisting and turning to get a better view. (his mirror wall had shifted to that of a three paneled one). If he hadn't been himself he would have started hitting on this fine body. He drooped when this thought made him wonder what the other yami's would think of his body.

(_Uh...Yami?_)

Atem froze. Oh he wasn't getting a good feeling.

((_Yes aibou?_)) He replied nonchalant nevertheless.

(_...Ano...we'll be landing soon_.)

The spirit narrowed his eyes. Yugi was hesitating. News was coming and he wasn't going to like it.

((_Anything else?_)) He couldn't help but ask. Inwardly he groaned. He was always a glutton for punishment.

(_Kaiba will be meeting us_.) Was the rushed response. Atem actually felt something die within him.

((_WHY?_)) He actually felt Yugi flinch at the- frankly- wailed question.

(_You know why._) His hikari replied after Atem had time to regain himself. He slumped. A pout becoming his new trademark look it seemed.

((_It just HAD to be Kaiba, didn't it?_))

~o~

"I can't believe you two!" Malik sputtered in disbelief. Though in actuallity he totally could. He just wanted to impress upon Ryou that he didn't always find Marik's shenanigans amusing. He along with Ryou and their respective yami's, were at Yugi's-currently-empty-place. The yami's had turned up late. They- the hikari's- had decided to throw them- Yugi and Atem- a welcome back party.

Easier said then done.

For one, they had to break into the Game shop/home first so as to decorate and such. Naturally Ryou had protested the whole time, saying that they should have the party at his place. Something that the other three didn't understand because in order to say welcome back at a party they felt it had to be right at the moment when they got home. But that was beside the point.

Right now, it was about the state the yami's were currently in.

To start off with, Bakura, had a broken arm held in a make shift splint. He also sported a split lip and a gash along his jaw line; both of which were still bleeding- albeit sluggishly. Marik- on the other hand- was favoring his left ankle, a dislocated shoulder (that Bakura had been all too happy to fix) sitting in what was once Bakura's over shirt (he was using it as a sling), and a bruising- not to mention- swelling cheek. On top of that, their leathers were completely ruined, along with Marik's silk shirt (that he actually _borrowed_ off Malik). Plus they both stunk to high heaven.

Needless to say...they looked like shit.

"What the hell happened! Go swimming in a dumpster or something?" The blond hikari shouted. Really, this wasn't their place. What did they think they were doing? Aw, they already muddied up the carpet.

"Well...we were being chased by the police-" Marik cracked just like Bakura thought he would.

"Again!" Malik cut him off. Though the others could tell his anger was giving way to amusement- if the twitching cheek could be believed.

"-and...well...we got caught in a dead end so unexpectedly...the police car..." Marik continued as if no one spoke.

"Crashed right into us." Bakura finished. "We managed to heal the most dangerous of wounds." He added wincing at the sudden jar of his arm. "We couldn't heal everything."

"Yeah, that's the Pharaoh's field of expertise." Marik piped up after patting his sore cheek.

"Being around you two," Ryou mumbled as he set up the remaining decorations, "I'm not surprised."

"Wait." Malik spoke up, as if realization just hit him. No one was actually helping Ryou set up. "What happened to the policeman?"

At the sudden question, both yami's looked away finding other things more interesting to look at. Bakura found himself looking at a shounin ai manga laying on the counter. By the thin layer of dust, either Yugi or Yami had been reading it before they left. He picked it up. _Kissing_? What kind of title was 'Kissing'?

"He's dead." Ryou deadpanned, not wanting to believe it, but not putting it past his yami.

"Well, if he isn't." Marik replied, a small smirk forming on his tanned face. "Then he's alive floating in the Shadow realm somewhere."

Bakura chuckled at that. Ryou sighed. Malik laughed.

Given the yami's luck he probably was floating alive in the Shadow realm.

~o~

For the second time in exactly thirty seconds Seto Kaiba wondered why he was doing this. Exactly five seconds later he was reminded that he would be the FIRST to see his rival in whatever state he was going to show up in. Given the spirits luck- the results of his amusement could vary.

Oh, he had long since accepted the fact that YES magic existed. It was only because of one _very_ memorable moment.

Simply, he had walked into- at the time- the Demonic Duo's...prank you could say. It ended up going for the worst and he broke his leg. Broke as in bone-sticking-out-of-his-skin broke. Luckily, Atem had been walking by, looking ready to kill in fact. He successfully assumed it had something to do with the people who broke his leg actually. Any way, off topic- Atem saw him sprawled on the ground and before he could refuse any help. Yami had done a series of hand gestures and the pain was gone.

It had been beyond embarrassing.

In the end, he ended up giving Atem the money in his wallet. He carried ALOT of cash and he hadn't given the money out of gratitude. As Mokuba knew, he'd had a crush on the spirit ever since he realized him and Yugi were two different entities. It had taken him a while because in the beginning he couldn't reconcile the feelings he was having in regards to _Yugi_.

"KAIBA!" A voice he couldn't ever forget called out. It sounded desperate and winded. Turning at the shout, he was greeted with the image of Yugi running towards his car. "Start-the-car! Start-the-car!" The hikari begged.

No sooner had those words left his mouth did Seto realize why such words were spoken. A group of twenty or so fan girls were on his tail and gaining. At least Mutou had sense to leave his luggage with his grandfather.

"Of shit." He gasped as he started the engine. Despite popular belief, Kaiba, did at times drive his own vehicles. Like today. Also Seto was not as calm and collected as he would have you believe. So it wasn't much of a surprise to Mokuba (who had been sitting in the passenger seat the whole time reading a book) when his brother put the petal to the metal as soon as Yugi put one foot in the car. The hikari had barely managed to shut the door, forget getting inside.

"Nii-san, slow down before you get a speeding ticket." the black-haired youth stated as he turned to the next page. "Again." he added as an after thought.

Yugi looked between the siblings, not used to the way they were acting. Given the situation, he'd just keep his mouth shut. It was after all around eleven in the morning. Whose to say they didn't act different in the morning? His current situation was surreal in any case.

Calming his racing heart (being chased by a mob did that to any one), he just about breathed a sigh of relief as they made it onto the freeway. Then he realized they were still speeding and a white van was turning into their lane.

"WATCH OUT!"

At Yugi's call Kaiba jerked the steering wheel to the right swerving their car into the other lane and just barely missing the vehicle. White as a sheet, the tri-haired teen fumbled for his seat belt.

~o~

Atem would have been sweating bullets if such a thing could happen in a soul room. He had watched the entire thing play out through Yugi's eyes. Having already seen this side of Kaiba he wasn't as surprised as his hikari. Yes, even the speeding. Seto was actually the first to know that Atem and the other yami's were hanging around together. He was even on his speed dial in case he needed a getaway car or alibi. But, that was beside the point. If there was one thing he was glad about at this moment, it was the fact he wasn't the one in control of the body.

(_Yami?_)

((_Yes, aibou?_)) He smirked at the waver in his hikari's voice.

(_How are you going to tell him?_) Oh, Atem already knew how this was going to go down. The smirk stretched across his face could attest to that.

He was extremely grateful Yugi had decided to take the seat behind the drivers seat. This way when he appeared, Kaiba wouldn't have a problem seeing him and he would get to see the look of complete shock unobstructed.

(_Yami, can I come in?_)

((_No! ...I mean, I'll be out in a second._)) He replied as soon as he felt Yugi trying to enter. He couldn't even muster up the feeling of guilt at the disappointed he could hear when his hikari spoke next.

(_Okay._)

Looking at the door that separated their soul rooms he was relieved Yugi hadn't pushed. Not that he would have, but these days he couldn't be sure. If Yugi had entered he would have witnessed how low his dark had fallen. You see, his room was a little messy...with girl clothes.

His style of girl clothes anyway.

Leathers, silks, mesh, you name it, it was there- thrown in heaps over his stone floor.

At the moment, he was wearing a black tube top that showed absolutely no cleavage and ended just above his navel. It zipped in the front and kept the girls in place; you couldn't even tell he was wearing a bra. Over that was basically a black net that masqueraded as a tank top with a v-neck; it was loose fitting and comfy falling around his hips. He couldn't bring himself to wear a skirt, but he kept a few whenever he managed the balls to do so. Instead, he was wearing leather pants that hung low on his hips and a tapered boot. Accessory wise, he wore a braided choker, three belts that didn't even hook onto his pants; one was braided, another was studded, the other a shiny black. He also had on the leather wrist bands he'd gotten from Bakura on his birthday, and the silver ring he'd gotten from Marik. Although his eyes were pierced he decided to got without.

It was embarrassing to admit to himself that this had been the fifteenth outfit he'd tried on. Suffice to say finding something to wear had gotten a bit out of hand.

Checking himself once more in the mirror, He gave himself a nod.

((_Aibou, I coming out._))

~o~

**A/N**

Second chapter done!

:3

From here on out, it should be smooth sailing. Sure there will be some mistakes here and there. I'm just going to go over and make sure everything flows together right.

I hope you enjoyed the read and will continue on with the following chapters.

Review it. Favorite it. Alert it. C2 it. Do what you will, as long as you do something.

Ken.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Yeah, so here I am, yet again, giving whoever's interested a good read. I find it funny, and I hope you guys do too! Enjoy and remember to review. XsmileX

Summery: A trip to China goes really REALLY bad for one ancient ex-pharaoh. What measures does he take to keep Bakura and Marik from finding out? Yugi has an idea but will Yami go for it? Especially when Seto is the one in on it?

(Yugi to Yami) ((Yami to Yugi))

&Ryo to Bakura& (&Bakura to Ryo&)

#Malik to Marik# (#Marik to Malik#)

(Yami's chatting together )

Troubles that Never Cease

Chapter 3

Exactly 4.9 seconds after fem-Yami revealed him-er herself, Seto and the cars inhabitants found themselves upside down, windows smashed, car dented, scratched, and everything else a car goes through after it's been in a wicked car crash. Good thing they had their seat belts on. Well, Yami didn't. Seeing as he really didn't have the time to put a seatbelt _on_, but…he was living and that's all that really mattered. 2.3 seconds later and groans of pain could be heard; as inaudible as they were.

Mokuba flipped to the next page of his novel.

"What the _hell_ was that for?!" Yami growled from his spot just outside the cars windshield. Yeah…he flew.

The slightly enraged spirit sported cuts, bruises, an arm broken in three places, either fractured or broken ribs, a sprained ankle, and a possible concussion. The trials of his tribulations he supposed….what ever _that_ meant. But what worried Yami more than anything, was that when he had tried to go into spirit form, he couldn't. He supposed it was because nobody else other than Yugi could see his spirit form, well him and his fellow yamis. Oh well, what mattered was that Seto knew _now_.

"It was your fault so don't come crying to me!" Seto retorted, whipping out his cell phone. He needed to call the freaking police now and inform them there had been an accident. Great. More problems. Now he'd mostly likely have to explain why the hell they got into an accident, in the first place. Just perfect. He was sure telling them that the cause of said accident was because his rival _magically_ appeared in the backseat of his car. Oh but that wasn't the kicker! Not only did he magically appear he wasn't the gender he was supposed to be! Heh, oh yes, that would go over so nicely.

He shouldn't have agreed to pick them up.

"Good Kami-sama!" A woman's voice cried out. Hm, who could that be? Mid-day, most people were at work now.

At least there wouldn't be big crowds, Seto thought impatiently, tapping his fingers on the stirring wheel. God, the stupid safety bag things hadn't even popped out.

POP!

…never mind…

Yugi looked around cautiously. He didn't seem to be hurt; no pain was overly apparent. That was always a bonus. Yes, it was decidedly a good thing that they had turned into a more residential area before the crash, Yugi thought as he took to just hanging limply in his seat. If not, they would have been in a more precarious situation than they already were in. Remember people, busy streets had _cars_. Think about how many vehicles would have smashed into them before everything had come to an actual _stop_. He shuddered. That would have been terrible. Luckily his ji-san had opted to wait for the cab instead.

"I'm so sorry!" that same woman's voice stated as her body came into Yugi and Seto's peripheral vision. Well her legs came into view. "Are you all okay?"

Seto got off the phone, cutting off whoever the hell the operator was. Stupid lady was going on and on about how he should stay calm and all that shit. Puh-leeze. This was nothing. And they _were_ calm. Hell even the stupid spirit was calm and HE…SHE flew through the freaking window!!

Oh God this was going to be weird…he just knew it. He should have gotten the _freaking_ details! But NO, as soon as he hears that Yami/Atem-the-fucking-EX-Pharaoh has gotten himself into an embarrassing situation he drops everything else just to see. Kami-sama, he was supposed to show a new game-thing at Kaiba land today. What happened to his priorities?

The stranger asked her question again. From what they could see, she was checking to see if Yami was okay. Yami, who just nodded and said yeah, she'll live. Even though he looked like he was about to keel over and kick the bucket. Meh.

The woman, they also noted, was middle aged, and seemed to take good care of her self…as in she was clean looking; good hygiene. And for some strange reason, she was acting as if the crash was entirely her fault.

"I could have sworn my son was walking right beside me!" she sort of wailed. Well that explained it.

Yugi and Seto simultaneously turned there heads to where a quiet sobbing could be heard. A child sat on the curb, snotty nosed and all, bawling his eyes out. Quite weird seeing as all they could hear was barely audible sobbing. Hm. Concussion perhaps?

Seto at that moment, reached for his glove compartment, popped it open, retrieved a hand full of bills hidden there, and shot them at the woman. This woman had just given him what he was going to say to the police; He swerved to save the life of a child. Pfft…yeah right.

"Thanks." he gruffly said as he set to undo his seatbelt. Mokuba turned yet another page and Yugi also set to undo his seat belt.

The woman looked on in confusion. She didn't deserve the money. Her son almost had them killed!

"Take it." the girl with shocking ruby eyes said. Her voice only hinting at the pain she was in. She suddenly felt even more guilty at the not-look she was receiving from the pretty girl. And that was saying something. Usually she wouldn't have cared much for people that were so obviously delinquents of some sort; if their clothes were anything to go by. But it was _her_ fault that they had crashed like they did. Honestly, she was surprised that the ones in the car seemed not to be hurt at all.

In the end, she picked up the cash, and almost had a heart attack at how much there was. Were these people bank robbers or something? Drug dealers?! Wait…was that _the,_ Seto Kaiba crawling out of the vehicle? Oh dear heavens.

Police sirens could be heard in the distance.

XxxX

"Okay, if they're not here by the time my favorite show's on I'm leaving." Marik muttered as he stared impatiently at the clock. Bakura glanced at him with utter boredom. Seems as if their wounds bothered them none.

"Why? So you could watch you're show?" the thief asked lazily. Staring at the blond psycho.

"No!" The tomb robber replied indignantly. "So I can rest humbly in my own home."

Bakura snorted. Yeah right. "You mean to drink away all of not only your current problems, but your past problems, as well."

The blond psycho gave a sagely nod.

"You have to admit…they should have been here already." Ryou stated worriedly; fidgeting with the manga Marik had discarded after reading it. He had currently only read half of the thing. He had to admit it was pretty interesting.

"Don't worry yourself." Malik mumbled from his position on the table. Who would have thought laying on the table was comfortable. He surely hadn't before today. "They probably knew people were going to throw them a welcome back party, and they ditched."

"Yugi ditched." Ryou deadpanned, staring at the blond hikari with disbelieving eyes.

"You're right, they died." Malik stated sitting up. "turn on the T.V and you'll see the news headlines saying (at this he waved his hand horizontally) King of Games, Yugi Motou, and hundreds of others, die tragically in a plane crash that will be remembered throughout the ages!"

Ryou looked horrified at the notion and proceeded to run into the living room to surf the news channels. Bakura merely stared at the only hikari in the kitchen with confused dark chocolate orbs.

"Why would it be throughout the ages?" He asked voice dripping honest to god confusion and curiosity. The blonds' yami also nodded at the question.

"It's because the _worlds _top ranking never-been defeated-except-a-few-times_ duelist DIED!!_" The violet eyed one exclaimed, arms waving at a phenomenal speed. "He would forever be the _true _King of Games and no one else would know if he could have ever been beaten! For Ra's sake people, _think_ about it."

"You think too much." Ryou's yami deduced. But he had to admit, he couldn't fight the logic the little blond produced.

Silence ensued.

"You GUYS!!"

Only to be broken by Ryou in the other room.

The kitchen's occupants eyes widened to that of saucers before rushing into where the other hikari was watching T.V.

Each one of them stopped in disbelief at what they saw on the telly.

XxxX

The tall brunet didn't know when a stupid news crew had come to _their_ accident scene, but they had, and all they seemed to be interested about was the fact they had saved the little boys life at the risk of their own. Good Ra, smite the ass of the bastard who made his limo late. Good thing he had managed to hide _Princess_ under his trench coat; god, and he had thought the Pharaoh had been petite before! He…she was currently hanging onto his torso as tightly as she could, while Yugi and Mokuba flanked him, somehow successfully hiding the fact someone _was_ under the insanely huge coat. He hadn't really wanted to have it explained to him why Yami not being able to go back into the puzzle was a problem…again.

The dragon keeper supposed it was incredibly lucky that he grabbed the only coat that was TOO big for him. Lucky to survive the crash, now that he thought about it. The car wasn't even distinguishable! One thing was obvious, somebody loved them up there.

"_Kaiba!"_ a harsh whisper. He smirked. "_It's fucking hot! How much longer!?"_

He cleared his throat. Which oddly enough sounded much like this. "Figh-ugh koff-migh-nigh" or, if you could use your imagination and think real hard…'Five minutes.'

Some silence. The bastard better of got that or-

"_That long?!"_

Seto felt firm limbs cling tighter to his bodyaccompanied by a growl. There was now no space between them, and Seto could feel every contour of his rivals body, pressed deliciously against his own.

This was…good.

XxxX

Somewhere in Domino A man, young in his years, was rundown in a violent car accident. What was strange about this was that the man had been safely beside a building, just exiting. Although he didn't die, he would be spending the next few months in recuperation. He was also the only one to be injured in the whole ordeal.

Up in the heaven's, Ra stared down into the domain of humans and laughed in triumph. One thought running through his divine mind; consider him smited, Seth.

XxxX

Owari

Kya ha!!

I really can't believe this story made it to a third chapter. But to the 13 reviewer's out there who believed, I hope you enjoyed this story. I had fun writing it.

Remember to review people!!!!

Kei


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N**- Holy freakin hell man!! THREE CHAPTERS!!! People enjoy the stupidity! REVIEWING KEEPS ME ALIVE, SO REVIEW!!!

Summery:

YMxYYxYB onesided SKxYY Follow Yami has he tries and hides what he believes will drive his fellow yamis away from him. He may actually cause more harm than not when Yugi enlists the help of one, Seto Kaiba. Let the jealousy abound and smiting begin!

(Yugi to Yami) ((Yami to Yugi))

&Ryo to Bakura& (&Bakura to Ryo&)

#Malik to Marik# (#Marik to Malik#)

(-Yami's chatting together-)

XxxX

Troubles that Never Cease

XxxX

Chapter 3

XxxX

"Okay, it's safe." Yugi stated as he shut the door to his friends limo. No sooner had that been said, did it look as if Seto let hang his gut with a satisfied sigh. His _gut_, scarily enough, looked like a gut sagging over the folds of his pants; as if he really had been sucking in some extra weight. Well it looked like that when his trench coat was closed. As soon as the fastings were undone Yami came sliding out like smooth butter, landing on the floor, between the legs.

"I thought I was going to die!" The ex-Pharoah panted as she crawled over Seto's lap and onto the seat next to him; Yugi and Mokuba were currently sitting opposite them. Ice blue eyes glared at him-her.

"Only you can find youself in a situation such as this." He sneered as he looked his rival up and down. "And last I checked, you wardrobe didn't consist of knee-high boots, and halter tops. What's this jewellery?"

"Shut-up!" Yami retorted with a glare. "I'm vain alright! I couldn't help myself!"

Yugi sighed. _Good Ra, this is going to be a long day_. He brought his hand up to rub his temple. _I almost die, and now must stop verbal spats between my yami and one of his rivals. Ugh, _he winced, _and his ego'd rants have turned into bitch fits. Hopefully this won't last as long as when I told him Seto was going to help._

"So I assume you wear make-up as well?"

"Hey! This is all natural!" The crimson eyed Yami replied pointing to her face.

"Sure looks like eye-liner to me." Kaiba snorted turning his head to stare out his window.

"Yami stop!" The little hikari shouted in barely concealed shock and panic. Arms reaching out to his yami as if to physically stop what was about to happen. Ah, it needn't be physical, as his words had done just that. Mokuba flipped the next page of his book, while Seto turned to see what Yugi had yelled for. His nose bumped lightly into a fist. He glared at it.

"Were you going to punch me?" He growled, eyes narrowing to mere slits.

"I thought about it." Yami replied nonchalantly; Bringing back her fist and folding it over her chest, eyes closed. God breast's were beginning to suck; Back was already getting sore. But to be honest, she was shocked. Never had she been so close to actually hurting someone...unless it was Bakura...or Marik, but they didn't count! Spirits DON'T count! And those damn police people, they never seemed to run out so it didn't really matter with them. But that was beside the point. Because of a silly, little, insignificant curse, she was willing to punch someone after only a few harsh, and insulting sentences? Didn't she have more self restraint than that? She hanged with the other yami's for Ra's sakes! They're the epitome of harsh words and sentences!!

"PMS much?" The blue eye-teen commented. The only warning he had was a twitch of an eye, and then he was suddenly bombarded with punches. Yugi rushed forward to try and stop the scuffle. Mokuba turned to the next page of his book, And the limo slowed down to a stop at a red light.

None noticed the wide-eyed stare they were recieving from Yugi's grandpa; who currently had his face pressed against the window of the taxi he was in; right beside the limo. Good God! Is this what his grandchild meant when he needed to talk with Seto Kaiba? After the light had turned green and traffic moved on, He settled into his seat. He had no idea that Atem and the eldest Kaiba were _involved_. He was glad that the windows were tinted, who knows what the paparrazi would have thought about this. He sighed. Guess he was a bit late on the whole birds and the bees speech then.

XxxX

"Oh god." Ryou muttered as he sat down on the couch. Rubbing his hands onto his face. Bakura looked on the verge of a tantrum, while Marik calmly drank one of the drinks they had brought for the _party_. Malik looked between the occupants of the room, sitting by the T.V, wondering if him speaking would cause a certain someone to lash out in a fit of misplaced rage. What the hell was he getting pissed about anyway? The blond hikari thought, staring at Ryou's yami; Ryou was still staring at the T.V.

"Well, by the looks of things, Yugi did ditch us." Malik stated deciding to at least say something. God, there was tension in the room and he didn't even know why. "Wonder where Yami went though. He hardly stays in the puzzle now a days."

"I wouldn't know." Bakura growled causing the hikaris to stare at him with confusion. Why was he so upset? "Atem cut off the link" he finished storming out of the living area. Marik followed seconds after.

"Jealous, worried or annoyed." The blond haired egyptian voiced as he lazily turned his head back to his fellow hikari. "What you think."

Ryou sighed.

"At this point, I'd say more worried than annoyed, but not so much of the jealous thing. I don't see why he would feel that."

"True." Malik muttered as he flopped onto the floor. "But then again, remember what his reaction was when Yami told them he was going to be gone during summer break?"

Ryou paled. His house had been practically destroyed. So much so that he was still staying at the blond's house waiting for the repairs to be done. Luckily his father was out of country and didn't asked much questions when he asked for a fair amount of money.

"I take it the party's off then?"

Ryou rushed passed his blond pal; becoming but a white blur.

"Bakura!!!" Don't do anything stupid!!"

Malik, still sitting where he may, wondered if this was going to be one of those times when he wished he bought a camera. A good one. An expensive one. Ah hell, he'll just hire a photographer.

"Malik! They're gone. We need to head over to Kaiba's ASAP!" the brown eyed teen stated rushing back picking up his discarded bag, and grabbing a drink from the table. At the wierd look he received from the Egyptian he had this to say.

"For the road."

Just as they were heading to the door, it opened revealing Yugi's grandpa. Who looked quite disgruntled and shaken up.

"Tell me you guys knew about the relationship between Yami and Kaiba." the old man spoke before they could try and explain why they were in his home. Instead they were left with mouths hanging open in disbelief. "I thought not. But you didn't hear it from me." he muttered as he walked passed them, jetlag catching up with him.

XxxX

"Speed up!" Bakura growled, wind whipping his white locks into a frenzy. They sat on the blonds motorcycle, racing passed vehicles of all kinds. He didn't really know why the thought of Atem ditching them irked him so much.

"I'm going as fast as this thing can!" Marik retorted. Ra, the albino was being pretty damn bitchy today. Why they didn't just travel through the shadow realm he'll never know. Infact... "Shadow realm would be hell of a lot faster!"

Next thing the blond knew, he drove right into a purplish black portal.

XxxX

The limo stopped in front of the mansion.

"I can't believe you two." Mokuba said stepping out of the vehicle first. He had been forced to help, when Yugi failed to stop the onesided fight. Seto had refused to hit the ex-pharoah, so had received the brunt of the attack. Faint bruises, and a busted lip. Huffing slightly, the male turned female stepped out next.

Yugi followed after, giving his darker half, disapproving looks. Just as Seto was stepping out, a purplish black portal appeared and the rev of an engine could be heard. Yugi knew it could either be Malik or Marik, but how they knew to come here was a mystery. Turning to Yami, he knew for sure who was coming.

"Midget!" ah yes, Bakura.

"Where the hell's the Pharaoh!?" and Marik.

The short hikari remembered what Ryou said about his destroyed house and hoped to dear Ra that his yami would just come out with it and say it; he was a woman, now.

Then everything stopped.

The engine died.

Seto got out of the car.

They saw Atem.

"_What the hell?!_"

**A/N**

SWEET!!!! Another CHAPTER IS OUT!!! Rejoice everyone!!! REJOICE AND REVIEW!!! Serious review. It's not so hard, just press that button down there and tell me what you think.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer- I do not own

xXx

Troubles that Never Cease

xXx

"_You know what they say…"_

_A questioning look._

"_If you truly love something, set it free…"_

_A sly smile. "And if it doesn't come back, hunt it down and drag it back kicking and screaming."_

"_Exactly."_

_Deadpanned. "Jerks"_

xXx

_-A handful of seconds earlier-_

There were only a handful of seconds left to devise some sort of ingenious plan to get out of what would be a highly degrading encounter; precious time that jumped out the proverbial window as soon as it was able. _They_ said something he couldn't be bothered to acknowledge. More than likely it was something insulting. Dammit. No time. No ingenious plan. Yami did what any normal person would have done. He prayed to the gods, and when the familiar rumble of the motorcycles engine more than thundered in his ears, he realized it wasn't working and did the next best thing. He chucked his puzzle with enough force that would have easily killed a mere mortal, straight at the driver (Marik), dove for the limo, kicked out the chauffer and booked it; leaving the others in his dust.

"What the hell!?" Marik shrieked when a big hunk of gold crashed into his skull. He stumbled back bumping into Bakura who growled at the sudden jar of his injured shoulder. They fell in a heap. With both yami's on the ground, momentarily distracted, the group just watched in abject horror as the only person who could confront the Dark's and live sped around a corner and out of sight. Seto watched because this was so not what he had been expecting when this all started.

"You freaky-assed Bitch! You better run!" Marik yelled as he pushed himself up, helped by Bakura who shoved the blonde to get off his person. "You're dead when I find you!" He continued to yell as he ripped off his ruined helmet.

"Who the fuck was that?" The albino muttered as he dusted himself off one-handedly. He didn't have protective gear to speak of, so for this moment, he was glad for not having the hindrance.

Yugi whipped his attention back to the duo disbelief etched on his cherubic face; shocked particularly at Bakura's question.

"You honestly couldn't tell?!" He practically shrieked, almost managing to mimic Marik's earlier tone.

Bakura replied with his own version of the '_duh'_ face, which Yugi found kind of creepy. Not really at the expression, because that look managed to make anyone feel dumb just by glimpsing it, but solely on the fact that Yugi was able to differentiate it from the many other looks Bakura made. Too much time spent in each other's presence? Yeah, he thought so too. Same could be said for Marik on that account.

"Well, I got a good look at the face and I haven't seen her before in my life." Marik said joining the current discussion, but only because the she-bitch ruined his favorite helmet and he needed to figure out who she was. That and taking in the way the pharaoh's brat was looking at them, it was obvious that they should've known who the crazy lady was.

"Trust me, I'd know." He added as if trying to defend himself from further scrutiny.

"Un-buh-lievable." The Light groaned rubbing his face in exasperation. Curious now but not willing to let go of the 'why' they had made an impromptu visit to Kaiba's place of living. Bakura shook it off and put back on the face everyone was used to seeing.

"Where's the Pharaoh?" he asked repeating Marik's earlier question.

"Oh for the love of…" Seto left the sentence hanging, and as soon as he got the attention of the two Yami's he gave a pointed look to the forgotten piece of jewellery that the two had for the most part of their existence tried and failed to get.

Enlightenment hit Bakura first. He muttered something the Dragon Keeper agreed on, a much needed drink.

"You have got to be kidding me." Marik mumbled, looking to where the limo disappeared to.

xXx

Panic was not all that new to Atem, not that he was on any sort of first name basis with the thing, but he met with it once or twice in his long tenure as a living being. But this was one of the few times that he was completely overcome in it. So much so he was almost hyperventilating; something that hadn't really happened since he was a child. Interesting.

A phone rang from somewhere to his side, and after screeching to a halt in an abandoned alley, he decided to answer it.

"Hello?" he greeted voice belying the fact he was sweating (now)non-existent balls.

"_Atem you dumb-shit! Where are you?!" _Bakura's voice blared from the tiny speakers. The girl cringed. Yeah, so wasn't the reaction he'd been expecting. But that didn't make it any easier.

xXx

A/N

So? How was that? Give me some feedback. Good? Bad? Good and constructive would be nice. Don't really know how to take it from here. Input would be greatly appreciated. The portion done in italics was filler. Don't really mean anything, but some way it kind of fits. If your thinking outside the proverbial box, that is. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the read.


	6. Chapter 6

Two light haired blurs hoofed it down the streets of Domino unintentionally mirroring their respective yami's almost perfectly. You know, except they were on actual streets, they weren't running from the cops, they had different styles of dress and their presence was notably less intimidating. But that's beside the point. They were running at break neck speeds. Speeds which would have actually _impressed_ their darker halves. People were diving out of their way, cursing them as they sped by. Malik had to execute a complex series of acrobatic flips and fluid jumps when oncoming traffic refused to stop (Ryou with a burst of speed managed to make it before the green light), only missing a white sedan by mere millimetres!

The most shocking of this spectacle? Ryou was talking into his cell- looking for all intents and purposes- unwinded while Malik yelled at people to get the hell out of their way. Thus allowing Ryou to continue running hazardously with a relatively clear path. It was really the only reason that he noticed what he noticed seeing as Ryou was completing engrossed with his cell. (People could almost mistake him for an expecting teen-daddy if not for the fact they already pegged Ryou as a gay).

They passed by a decrepit alley, Malik glanced in to make sure nothing was coming and was confused to see a fairly nice, new looking limo parked suspiciously in it's shadows. And a female Yami. Violet eyes bugged out like this - (O-O) and Malik went careening into a brick wall. Ryou ran another full block before he realized the blond hikari was no longer with him.

…...

Yami held the phone with a vice-like grip, teeth grinding as Bakura continued to rant on about how it wasn't a big deal that he was in a female body. An ice cold glare that Seto would have been proud of was set on his face (_HIS_ PEOPLE, HIS! He was a freaking guy and no matter the freaking physical pluses a female body seemed to have… it was only aesthetic. He was male, so he was going to refer _himself_ as such. The first person to contradict him was going to regret it… oh they'd regret it alright but first…). It wasn't a _big _deal? _Wasn't_ a big _deal_? He'd show that bastard how much it wasn't a big deal! Having already been winding down the window he let go a fierce inhuman screech before chucking the phone at a graffiti defiled wall. The words "fuck you" sprayed intricately across the brick surface only, for some reason, making him angrier.

Glaring at the shattered device he blindly reached for the ignition. Yami was already in the midst of thinking dark dangerous thoughts when Malik quite suddenly popped up into the angered spirit's vision and an even more devious idea sprung forth. A crazy, irrational, CRAZY idea. A twisted, unnatural smile spread across his face

"Yami, what the _hell_ hap- wuah!" The blond was cut off as the usually tamer of three yami's yanked him into the vehicle until he was hanging halfway through. Blazing red irises zeroed onto Malik's stunned but frightened face. The definite bruising he'd get from this manhandling suddenly didn't seem worth voicing his protest in light of the ex-pharaoh's heated gaze and demented smile. And as selfish as it was, he wished Ryou was in his place right now. Malik in this very moment, understood with every ounce of his being, that Yami should never _ever_ be considered anything less than what he was- dark, and that he was foolish to think otherwise.

"Lets visit big sis, hm?" Yami drawled sending a distinct chill of foreboding down his spine. Not for himself no, the feeling would have been overwhelming if that were the case. This was for just being caught in the crossfire. Malik was pretty fucking sure it was because of Bakura. If you ever saw Yami feeling "negative" it was most always Bakura. This was definitely one of those times. Maybe it had to do with Yami being a girl at the moment.

Before he could reply, not that he could have gotten his tongue to work even if he had something to say, a purplish block portal opened up swallowing them whole. Sending them towards his dear sister Ishtar.

Ryou walking passed the abandoned limo only giving the vehicle a cursory glance only moments later before trying to spot his blond haired companion with cute confusion, growing frustration and a smidge of worry.

…...

Bakura glared at Seto's cell, the sound of a disconnected call blaringly obvious even as he held it in front of his face.

"I think you might of pissed him off." Marik was quick to point out with a growing smile not unlike the one Yami had sported. The many ways in which Atem had gotten back at Bakura for angering him were just plain awesome and ingenious. This up and coming one was sure to be a good one. Even better because Bakura was blind to what was coming. As proven with his rebuttal.

"What are you talking about?" the white haired yami growled in annoyance. "I was just telling him it was okay."

The defence was weak and he almost seemed to be pouting.

The two yami's were the last ones outside of the manor. Standing at the entrance with a beeping phone between them. The blond thought Bakura had yet to hang up because he couldn't actually believe that Atem had, in a manner of speaking, cut them off. Everyone else had preceded to go inside and discuss what had happened with Yami and his whole gender switch. As much as the story would have been indubitably amusing, what was the point in knowing the how? Atem was a female now and all they needed to figure out was what they needed to do to turn him back. Fuck the how.

When Bakura finally disconnected the call a few minutes later after coming back from his thoughts they headed inside to find the others in one of the main rooms off to the right. Where they then caught the end of the conversation Yugi was currently having with Ryou.

"What do you mean Malik went missing?" Yugi asked incredulously.

Yeah that definitely wasn't a chill the darks suddenly felt at the news. Uneasy, Marik had a feeling he wouldn't be free from whatever Yami maybe planning for Bakura.

_A/N_

_So what do you think? How do you like? Sorry for the long wait! _


End file.
